Looking back to before surgery, I had such hope and anticipation. Oh how I wish I could will my hip to begin to feel better. I feel like I have stalled for a month or so. In fact, both hips are a bit more angry since before my Vail follow-up. I think it is from the surgeon moving my hips more than they like to go. I am still waiting for anesthetic cream. I hope it comes soon as I really need something to break this pain cycle. Currently, I am still worse than before my surgery. I feel that every surgery I have it makes me worse. Each time I can't imagine things getting worse, yet they always seem to do. It is so frustrating to feel like there is no end in sight. I hope my new exercises kick in soon as I don't know how I would fit in another surgery (or two if my other hip doesn't start behaving himself!). I go through waves of uncertainty and worry. I absolutely know I am paranoid about my hips feeling this crappy, but, man alive! I've even had dreams (rather nightmares) about me having more surgeries. I realize that Dr. P hasn't said anything definitively yet, but the idea that further surgery is a possibility is disheartening. But, if I don't start to feel better soon, and if I do need more surgery, the break from school (probably a year) would be a welcomed break. I am having a VERY hard time keeping up and enjoying life. I would consider myself to be a relatively upbeat person, but lately I feel so stuck. Stuck in pain, not even wanting to move, putting on a smile each day despite feeling like this; it is exhausting. I really need to get over this and on with life.
Here's hoping that my OPERATION HIP FLEXION starts to progress. My hip flexion is still stuck at 95* and no pain improvement.