Horrible Night

So up until yesterday and last night I would definitely say that this recovery has been easier than my previous two surgeries, but the last 36 hours (and continuing) have been quite painful. I haven't a clue what the heck I did differently, but man am I sore! I just throb all night, even when on my narcotics!

Plus, I have developed this irrational fear. I can't tell if it is the pills that have made me think of this or just boredom and an out-of-control imagination during the wee hours of the morning whilst lying awake in my recliner, but I am terrified of somebody breaking into my house. I am stuck in my recliner and basically not able to fend for myself and if somebody came in there would be no way for me to defend myself. Gall, writing this down seems so childish and odd that I would actually be scared of this. Perhaps it is the narcotics that are making me think oddly like this because I understand that the chances are slim-to-none that such a thing would happen, but still, during the night, I am fearful. Blaaaah.

It also doesn't help to be throbbing in pain even when pumped full of oxycodone! Last night I found myself holding my breath with each inspiration due to the pain in my hip. I bet this is probably just a bad day or so and things will get better from here. But having this blog and venting really, really helps deal with the recovery process (especially when there is the knawing thought at the back of my mind that all this might not even be the fix to my hip problems). So, if you made it this far through my rant and complaining, kudos to you and thanks!! :)