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Sunday, September 18, 2011

Reading Old Posts

I had previously kept a blog that chronicled my first hip scope. I was flipping through it to see how I felt at the 9 week mark for my first scope on the right side. Although I couldn't find the exact post I got reading and it made me very sad. I was so positive and hopeful that my one surgery was going to be it for me and my hip troubles. When my left hip started hurting I read about me complaining about the possibility of having another hip scope. If I ever knew that I'd need two more scopes and then a reconstruction I probably would have died. I suppose that is why we are unable to see the future.

I am really going through a rough time right now. I hurt so much. Every step I take, my hip and back hurts. My back even hurts when I breathe while I am lying in bed. I just feel like everything from my bellybutton to my knees is inflamed and hurts. I hate to continuously having to take medication, but I really can't function without taking something.

I have to apologize for this blog turning into a sob story each time I post. I really am not a depressing type of person, but I have to have an outlet for my feelings. I don't feel like I can complain to anybody but my Mum...and even she can only listen to so much complaining. Currently my Dad is dealing with a sore knee and he complains non-stop about it. This makes me want to share even less with the people around me. I hate complaining but I suppose complaining anonymously on the Internet is a safer outlet at the moment. It isn't that I don't have support in my life, I just can't complain 24/7 about my throbbing hip and back.

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