Even though I have just got up from my restless night's sleep, I thought that I have some time whilst in the CPM that I could cook up a post here. These last couple of days have been a little bit more difficult dealing with the whole being off school for 8 months and graduating later deal. I know that the sick people will still be there, but I can't help feeling as if I'm stuck in life, stalled because of my hips. I truly know I had no other choice. Regardless, it still is disheartening to know that all of my classmates are out there moving through their medical education while I sit at home and paint by number!!
This week was to be my planned transition from third to fourth year medical school. Meaning that I was expected to go back to campus and take several tests, simulations, standardized patients this week for preparation for the upcoming board examinations. All of my friends are back on campus and stressing out. I wish I was stressing out with them! They are amazing people and I miss them so much. Although a couple of us Skype every few weeks, I miss studying with them, stressing with them, decompressing with them. I would lie to say that I would be missing the exams. They are expected to be undoubtedly stressful, but at least I would be working towards something. I would be learning. My email inbox keeps flowing with information and instructions for the week as I am still on their email list. It makes me sad. I even dreamt about this last night.
Having said all of this though, I know I made the right decision. I was not functioning. I couldn't stand for 5 minutes nor could I walk for more than 10 minutes. Things were pretty bad and I am still sorting out my hips. Dealing with this intense pain and inability to function whilst on medical school rotations was next to, rather, definitely impossible. Hence, here I sit: in the CPM hoping this surgery is the last surgery on my left hip for a very long time.
Maybe I'm just seriously paranoid, but my anterior hip is getting more sore. Not the excruciating pain, but definitely tightness and pain. Mostly at the end point of flexion and when doing the cat portion of my cat camel exercises. I am a bit concerned and will bring it up with my PT and perhaps with the PA when he calls next. He calls every other week to ensure things are still going alright.
My plans today: CPM (x6 hours), read, ice, exercises (x2), pool (no exercises though, can't handle doing two days in a row), circumduction.